


Do dreams come true?

by MRTx



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-25
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2020-09-26 16:49:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20392963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MRTx/pseuds/MRTx
Summary: What if one night a couple of years ago changed everything? What if from that moment Lexa was constantly thinking about what she said, what she could've said? What can she do about it now?





	1. Chapter 1

Everything there was peaceful. That day was just perfect. The sun was shining, the wind blew just the right way. It was warm but not too hot. The atmosphere was just the way Lexa liked. 

They were sitting in their favorite spot in the Tri Park. It wasn't as giant as central park, but it was quite big. Their favorite spot was just a few meters from the main road here. It was a space surrounded by a lot of broadleaf trees. In the middle of this space there are three seats. Lexa was sitting in the middle one here. Next to her to the right was sitting Anya, to her left was sitting Lincoln. They really liked this spot because it was so peaceful but today it was even more peaceful than ever. 

They sat here engaging in small talk. 

"So how about going to the Grounders?" 

Asked Lincoln turning towards both girls. That was their place to eat, drink, meet with the grand and have some fun. It was a friend's bar that they adopted as their hanging spot. 

"I would kill for Nyko's burger." 

Answered Anya. 

"How about you Lexa?" 

Both of her friends turned their attention towards her. Unfortunately ruining this some kind of special, quiet moment. Lexa didn't know what it was but it was all too good to be true. 

"I guess we could go there." 

She said. But Not any one of them started to talk again or stood up. Not one of them seemed to mind. They were all there in this moment and it was all that mattered for now. 

Two of the brunette's friends started to talk again but she was not in this space mentally. Of course she was here but she seemed to think about something different. But the truth is that she didn't think about anything at all, not now. 

They were sitting there for quite some time. Everything still the same. Quiet, peaceful and empty. There wasn't anyone there except them. 

Next thing Lexa knows is that Anya is shifting uncomfortably in her seat. She looks at her and sees a weird emotion on her face. 

"HI, I think you should go the other way. You know?."

She says looking in front of her towards the road that leads through the park. She says this in a very weird voice clearly uncomfortable saying that. 

Someone appeared in front of them. She could feel that but she didn't look that way. 

That someone asked why. That voice sounded familiar but at the same time Lexa couldn't say to whom it belonged. She didn't look at that someone, she looked at the ground somehow ashamed. 

Anya's answer to that person's question was a simple left hand gesture towards Lexa. 

At that time Lexa looked in front of her and she saw her. There in the middle of the road a couple of meters away was standing the one and only. 

At first she didn't recognize her but then it all came to her. It was Clarke. At the same time she felt like the weight of the world was on her shoulders but also like the burden was lifted off of her. 

The blonde answered to Anya's hand gesture. 

"I don't think there should be a problem." 

She said uncomfortable too clearly looking for affirmation. She was standing still there giving them all some space. 

Both of Lexa's friends turned to her with unbelievable faces. They were searching for some kind of affirmation out of her. That it was indeed alright. That it was all okay. A

The brunette still looking at her feet decided to say. 

"I don't think there should be." 

After that the stood up and very slowly started to walk towards Clarke. Every step felt like two meters long but also like she was standing in the same spot not moving at all. 

Lincoln with Anya were watching with wild eyes. Looking at what is happening in front of their eyes and thinking what is going to happen. 

When Lexa eventually walked to Clarke and was closer to her than two meters everything seemed like the time stopped. Like everything around them vanished. There was no sun, no wind, no park, no trees. There was nothing except for her and the girl in front of her. 

They were both looking at each other with emotions running through their eyes but neither of them said a word, neither of them moved. 

Then in a blink of an eye they both stepped each a meter towards and hugged. 

Now all the emotions and thoughts in their heads seemed to slow down. Then it was even more peaceful than she first thought. 

The girls were standing there hugging each other being comfortable with a just being there in this place and this time. 

Everything around them seemed to reappear. Again Lexa felt the sun on her face and the wind blowing just the right way. 

Their arms were around each other. Clarke being a little bit shorter curled up in Lexa's neck. They were standing like that both afraid to ruin this idyllic moment. Afraid of the world that they knew. They seemed to forget about everything. 

Then Lexa felt Clarke's breath on her neck. It was a very pleasant feeling but she was afraid of what she blonde girl would like to say. 

But she was right.

"You know if we're going to do this, it's going to be a lot of work." 

Said the blonde girl looking straight into the other girl's green eyes. Lexa didn't say anything, she was looking straight ahead. She felt Clarke's head returning to its place in her neck. She hugged the blonde girl even harder and said. 

" It is going to be a lot of work." 

Lexa woke up from this beautiful dream confused. She sat in her bed with the sheets all curled and twisted. She didn't want to believe it. No. Not again. 

"Fuck, fuck, fuck" 

She said rubbing the palms of her hands in her temples. She didn't know why after all these years that girl still hunted her dreams. She was only telling herself that. 

She knew why. Of course she knew.


	2. Chapter 2

It was getting darker and darker as she was walking through this forest. She wasn't scared of the dark or afraid that something might happen. This place was so quiet and oddly calming that she felt here like at home. The trees were slowly moving their branches and leaves to the rhythm of the wind. 

Full moon was giving just enough light so Lexa didn't need a flashlight. She was walking this path for some time now but didn't exactly knew for how long. 

Next thing she sees is more light than in the forest. She saw an opening. There on her left was this small water pond or lake. Next one was bigger and on her right. Between this ponds there was a long path illuminated by the moon. 

This path lead towards huge and dark mountains. Lexa was standing there in the middle of the path between the ponds looking at the moon which was so magical that she thought she was in some kind of a trance. . 

Trees behind her were swinging with the help of small blows of wind. Same was for the ponds' reed. 

Next thing she knew was that someone was walking towards her. Two people were walking this path she was standing on towards her from the side of the mountains. They were silent walking quite slow. When they came closer she could see that the second person was Clarke. The first one she didn't recognize. 

They stood in front of her and turned around walking towards the bigger lake. Lexa followed them without a word. When they started to walk into the water Clarke turned to her and and smiled with that reassuring smile. Smile that said clearly that it's okay. 

This trip was unusual. They were walking underwater and were observing things there. Lexa figured out that the first person was kind of a tourist guide. She thought that she wasn't a great one because she didn't talk about anything that they were looking at but at the same time she thought that how could she they were underwater. Talking there was kind of impossible. 

Either way she had a lot of fun watching fishes swimming around or water plants stirred by water or them walking by. 

Clarke seemed to feel exactly the same way. She looked happy. 

Next the three of them walked out of the water on the path. This guide walked back to the forest from where Lexa came. So they were alone there in the middle of the night with full moon watching over them. 

They looked at themself in the same time smiled and said exactly the same thing. 

"Let's go for a swim." 

They laughed, ran towards the smaller lake and took of their shoes. 

The girls ran into the water and started to swim around having a time of their lives. Each one of them swam around but in the other direction. 

When they finally met in the middle they stopped swimming and got close to each other. They were talking about anything and everything laughing and splashing water around them. 

Then they stopped laughing. Lexa felt that her heart started to beat faster and faster. She was looking at Clarke and Clarke was looking at her the same way. She looked directly into her blue eyes and then at her plump lips. 

She didn't wait any longer she swam even closer. Lexa laid her hand on Clarke's cheek and put her lips on hers. Her eyes were closed but she was sure as hell that she saw fireworks. Clarke immediately returned the kiss slightly opening her mouth waiting for the deepening of the kiss they shared. 

This kiss started sweet but became heated in a matter of seconds. They came closer to each other. Now the girls were totally connected and their hands and legs interlocked with each other's. 

Clarke's hands were now around Lexa's neck and the brunette's ones were around the blonde's waist. They were skin to skin almost. 

As the kiss started to get even more heated Clarke took off her shirt and now Lexa could feel her skin slightly covered with goosebumps from the cold water under her finger tips. 

She looked her in the eyes and those that were as blue as a sky were now black also like a sky but at night. 

Lexa started to kiss her on the neck. 

Then Clarke stopped. And Lexa took one step away from her giving her distance. 

The blonde one started to talk. 

"We really need to talk about…" 

Beep Beep Beep. Beep Beep Beep. 

Lexa woke up frustrated to put it in right words.  
She was all covered in sweat but it wasn't from a nightmare. Literally from the opposite. 

The alarm took her by surprise so she was angry as she slammed her hand on her phone to mute this monstrosity. 

"This is going to be a really great day." 

She said with a lot of sarcasm to herself as she took her towel and headed to take a shower. This was indeed going to be a really great day. Or not so great but at least a very long one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry about the late update. Things in my life are a little crazy right now but I will try do do my best here.  
Thank you for stopping by.  
You're welcome to leave a comment or/and kudos if you liked it or not.  
Be safe.  
MRT


	3. Chapter 3

As she was walking out of her office on this Friday evening she heard her phone going off. Lexa saw that Lincoln was calling her. She answered the phone. 

"Hello?" 

She said looking for the keys to her car lost somewhere in her bag. 

"Hi Lexa we are meeting up at the Grounders and you need to come too." 

"Do I have a choice?" 

Asked the brunette slightly annoyed. She loved them dearly but they were sometimes a pain in the ass. But the truth is that they didn't see each other for some time. They were once a really great gang. They were doing everything together but some things change.

Some people change and some people are just so stubborn that it hurts and the group was divided into everyone and Lexa. 

"No you don't. Come on we didn't see each other for so long we need to catch up." 

"I don't know I'm sure that I have a very important meeting this afternoon with my couch and Netflix." 

She laughed to her phone. Still looking for her keys. This bag was something of a black hole. She didn't always struggle this hard to find anything but today was just one of those days. 

"Lexa come on. We'll be there at 9. And you'll be there too. End of conversation." 

Said Lincoln begging her to meet with the gang. 

"YES!" 

Shouted Lexa finally being able to locate keys to her vehicle. 

"Okay. See ya tonight" 

Lincoln decided to cut this conversation short after hearing some kind of affirmation from the brunette girl. 

"Not what I was talking about but okay." 

She smiled as she opened her bordo Tesla model s. She really loved her car because it was all electric and she felt great being inside it. And to say the least she could afford it because her company was doing great. 

She turned the engine on and went home. 

Her apartment was in the middle of the city of Polis. It was a beautiful quite big penthouse with so much open space decorated like a loft. On the walls there was a lot of concrete. Floors were wooden but with a darker shade. In her apartment was a lot of wooden furniture mixed with said concrete and gray and black colors. There were also many plants but kinds that didn't need a lot of attention. 

She really liked one of the walls which was all made of glass because the view from up there was amazing. 

She opened doors to her home and turned the lights on. Lexa really liked her apartment but she could admit that it was kind of cold like something was missing here but she couldn't figure out why. 

She opened her fridge in search of something to eat before going out but the thing that she was trying not to forget which was also written on a note on the fridge was to go for groceries. So she was standing now in front of milk, carrots, two eggs, cheese and avocado. 

"There are so many possibilities." 

Said to no one in particular laughing at the same time. She decided to drink water instead. She could order at the Grounders they always had a great food there. 

She decided to take a quick shower and change. As her outfit Lexa wanted something casual and comfortable so she decided to wear simple cotton checked pants black boots, black t-shirt and gray coat. 

It was just a friends' meeting so she didn't need to try so hard but from the other side she didn't see them for quite long so she needed to at least look like she manages her life. Like she's doing great. 

She left her home on foot because the bar wasn't far away and their group of friends always had a place they met up before so they could go there together. 

They always met up by this weird fountain in their city. It was just natural to them because they've done that for years now. 

As Lexa was walking to it she saw that Raven, Lincoln and Gustus were already here. 

"Hello there."

She said waving to them all. The first one to greet her was of course Lincoln. He smiled so big that Lexa really thought that they all missed her. He hugged her so hard. 

"Oh God it's been so long Lexa." 

Said the gentle giant. They all hugged each other and Raven started to be so hyperactive. Asking a million questions at once. 

"Raven stop. I need to ask too but wait not everybody is here so Lexa would have to talk twice." 

Said Lincoln laughing at the girl. 

"Of course because as usual who is missing? Let me think oh. IT'S ALWAYS ANYA." 

Said the Latina. It was all true they were always telling Anya that they meet up an hour before the actual time but she amazed them every time with being late even then. 

They engaged in a small talk waiting for the dirty blonde girl. As she was walking towards them they all cheered. 

"Congratulation, new best time." 

Said Lexa laughing looking at the girl's face next hugging her. 

"I'm going to blow you up someday." 

Said Raven with that devilish smile on her face. They all knew that she could do that because she had unhealthy bombs mania. 

The walk to the Grounders was quick so they talk only for a couple of minutes. But hey as usual were teasing each other and laughing all the way. 

As they walked to the bar Lincoln turned to Lexa and said. 

"Anyway Clarke's going to be here too." 

Lexa was in shock but she was trying to act normal around them. 

"Ym… YeYeah… That's great." 

She said with forced false smile. 

"I'm just teasing you. Relax we're all here incognito." 

She said jokingly but the truth was that they all were here in fact incognito because no one of them told Clarke about this meeting. The truth be told that she would have been really angry if she knew that they were meeting with Lexa and behind her back. 

So this is how it is for a couple of years now. They sometimes meet in secret so Clarke wouldn't know. It's hard for all of them and Lexa knows that it is all her fault. She tried to fix it once but it was even worse than before and it was all because of her stupidity. 

So now this is how it is. They all are good friends with Clarke and sometimes friends with Lexa. If it wasn't her fault then she would've been furious. But she knows that maybe it's better that way. 

They all walked to their favorite spot, sat and ordered drinks and food. Lexa stood with her all time favorite pizza that she was sharing with Lincoln. 

"Where's Octavia?" 

Asked Lexa about Lincoln's girlfriend but also a member of their squad. 

"She's on a business trip in Washington. She's got a client there so she's staying there for two weeks."

Answered Lincoln and Anya nodded. Octavia and Anya have a Law firm together. Their idea started when they both worked at their mentor's firm. Indra was their greatest teacher and boss but she decided to move her firm across the states. That was when they decided that it would be great to have something on their own. 

Lincoln was a sport reporter but also an owner of (in Lexa's opinion) the best gym in the city of Polis. When she didn't know what to do she usually found herself working out there. Lincoln and Octavia are a great couple for a lot of years now so everyone expect them to get married anytime now. 

Almost all of them are the same age as Lexa. Except for Octavia who is two years younger and Gustus. They were friends even in a high school. 

Gustus is a little bit older than the rest of the group. He's 32. They all met him at an event held in a dog park where you could adopt puppies and dogs. They all went there but didn't adopt any dog because they wanted them all. Only Gustus did adopt a gray Cane Corso and named him Jimmy. He has an art gallery in the city and he is very proud of it. But he's even more proud of his band which performed on every art gallery exhibition. He is a guitarist and a singer. Everyone made fun of him because he was a giant man with a lot of tattoos and a beard but he had an art gallery. The band everyone understood because he looked the part. People could be sarcastic but their friends believed in him and his dreams. 

Raven was the smartest of them all. She graduated from University with only God knows how many majors and had a lot of degrees. She had always loved science, chemistry, physics and making things go boom. So she stayed at the best University in City which happened to have the greatest science laboratories. She's always making something new and exciting. 

And there was Lexa. She made her company when she was 21 so now when she's 28 it grew to a massive size. Her company does everything considers as an alternative energy sources. Things considered as: Wave Energy, Biofuels, Natural Gas, Geothermal Power, Wind Energy, Biomass Energy, Tidal Energy, Hydrogen Gas. So in this times those things are greatly appreciated and wanted. Her company is very successful but she's also kind of tired of it all and of not having anything else to do. 

There was also Clarke but they don't talk about her often. She followed her mother's tracks and became a doctor, surgeon. But Lexa didn't know anything else. 

The gang was the greatest and strongest when they were in high school and collage. Then it all went down and now she sometimes sees them but of course without one person who hates her. 

"So how is your company?" 

Said Gustus.

"Great but tiring. We have so many projects right not that it sometimes is hard to follow them all." 

Answered Lexa. In the back of her head she had all the projects that her company was doing right now. 

"And how's your gallery and band?" 

Asked Lexa. She was always there when his band had a gig or when he started to make art exhibitions but right now her job was taking all of her time. Or was it only an excuse? 

"They are both awesome. I will have an opening night in about three weeks. Of course you're all welcome then and anytime." 

Answered Gustus. 

The evening was turning into a night as they were talking and laughing at everything. So Lexa found herself looking at her friends and wondering if this could be her normal day if she wouldn't have broke up the squad. This was very nice. And then she heard that Clarke's topic was on. 

"... and her boyfriend was just standing there." 

Lexa started to listen but was in a great shock. So Clarke was in a relationship. Great. 

Anya stopped talking and turned to Lexa sitting in front of her. 

"You know that Clarke has a boyfriend now RIGHT? 

" Yes of course. No I don't. How am I supposed to know this. Should I call her and ask how is she. "

She said sarcastically but also trying to sound funny. By the looks of everyone she knew that she had succeeded. Everyone was laughing. 

"Remember that one time we met behind Clarke's back, you Lexa took a photo of us by our old neighborhood, Anya posted it and Clarke was asking to be tagged as a photographer?" 

Said Lincoln while couldn't hold his breath from laughing so hard. They all laughed. It was a nice memory from a not so nice times. 

"Yeah I remember, she thought that she was the one taking it." 

Answered Lexa.

Clarke's topic rarely came when they were together. It was a hard one because all of them felt guilty that they were going behind her back and having this secret just to meet with their friend. 

"Do you want to make up with her?" 

Suddenly said Lincoln to Lexa. 

"Yes I would love to. It would make our group whole again and everything could be easier. But I'm not sure if that's possible." 

Answered truthfully the brunette. 

"I still don't know why you fell out in the first place." 

Oh boy. 

It is logical that when you had a best friend and you knew their secrets and now you're not talking that you can't tell them.  
But what when you have a secret that's connected to someone else and this secret contains of your secret and other person's secret can you tell it to someone or is it overstepping?

That's the biggest question.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there. It wasn't so long of a wait this time. Anyway let me know what do you think if you'd like to.  
Be free to also leave kudos.  
Be save.  
-MRT


	4. Chapter 4

The hike was kind of a long one but rewarding as hell. The view was just amazing. 

That day was kind of a short one. It turned into a night quite fast. Lexa with her friends walked into that camping ground they were supposed to set up a camp on. They had everything with them. Everything they need for this adventure. Of course the most important things like tents, sleeping bags and stuff. 

They were hiking for some time now all packed up with big backpacks and a lot of things. The hike was great because they were in the most beautiful mountains Lexa had ever seen. 

Lexa was here with Lincoln, Octavia, Raven, Gustus, Anya and Bellamy. When all of them finally gathered around campfire. The first one who finished setting up a tent Mada a campfire. 

When they finished they all came to sit by the campfire. Then they heard someone walking towards them. It was a blonde woman with a fairly light skin tone. She waved her hand in a gesture that indicated that they needed to follow her. 

She turned around and started to walk down the path. They all followed this mysterious woman without a word of an objection. They were walking until they saw an entrance to a cave. The friends followed this woman inside. At first the cave seemed to be a small one and there was nothing to see there it was just a small corridor. Lexa started to think about what was the purpose of that lady. 

Yep. This is how they're going to die. 

Why was she guiding them in the middle of the night to some cave that was nothing special. 

She was so wrong about that cave. Then they saw some light. But what they came into was something out of a fantasy movie. And some pretty good one with a CGI worth dying for. It wasn't possible for a cave to be this huge and beautiful. It was an enormous open space with a whole ecosystem here. There were trees, water ponds, moon light coming from somewhere and so much more. 

When they all were fascinated by that place and looking all around them the lady was standing in the middle of that place. She then pointed at the ceiling. There in the ceiling of the cave was something like a volcano crater. But they were inside so it was like a cylindrical opening. There between walls of that cylinder was a big rock that was shaped like a human skull. This crater led to she open air. From that place moonlight was coming inside cave so they could see anything down here. It was an amazing, mesmerizing place and full moon was shining so bright that they really could see everything. 

The lady still standing in the same place told them that there is a way up there to that magnificent rock if they would like to go there. Of course they all agreed that they need to see it closely. The lady guided them to that way up there that she was talking about. 

It turned out to be an old mining elevator. Anya and Lexa decided that they were going first. The two of them stepped into it, closed the doors and the woman pushed some lever and they started to get up. It was a long drive because that rock turned out to be further away than they expected bul also because that elevator was not in a great shape. 

The skull rock was coming more and more into view. It was much larger than they thought. 

Then something started to happen. The elevator started to shake and there was a lot of weird notices coming out of it. The girls turned to each other with fear in their eyes and sadly accepted their fate. There was nowhere to run to and they were too high to jump. It could be their end. 

Then the rope holding their elevator snapped and they started to fall. There in the moment of a certain death Lexa had only one person on her mind. Person she had hurt so much. Person she had feelings for for almost half of her life. And there was only one thing stuck inside her head - Clarke hates me and I never got to truly apologize to her because I was a stubborn piece of shit. 

They hit the ground kind of lightly. Anya fell but then stood up and checked Lexa. She wasn't injured in any kind. The only thing that had happened to Lexa was that she banged her head against the metal door. She now had a cut starting from her hairline and ending on her right brow. The blood was flowing out of it but it was nothing serious. 

She was sitting there with some kind of conclusion when she saw her. That beautiful blonde. Clarke was running to her. She fell on her knees and took Lexa's head and put it in her lap. She was looking up at the girl that was trying to stop the bleeding from the cut. 

She felt save. She felt great. She smiled and closed her eyes. 

"Bzzzzz Bzzzzz Bzzzzz" 

Was the next thing Lexa heard. Again her alarm clock was telling her that it was enough sleeping. For some reason she felt super tensed and could feel the sweat on her back but at the same time she felt at ease. It was a dream that actually turned out okay. Yeah sure she probably died or something like that but in whose arms. That was a small step into having a good day. A small step turns into even smaller one when you remember that you fucked things up with the girl you so much cared about. 

Da, you still do. And it probably won't change. Not now, not ever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there. I'm glad if you liked it. If not that's okay too. You can tell me about it in the comments.   
I'm sorry for the wait. I got my shit together. At least I think I did. So some of the chapters are ready. And some are inside my head ready to be written. If you would like to see what happens next stay tuned. Bye.  
Be safe.   
-MRT


	5. Chapter 5

Lexa was sitting on her couch in the living room with a lot of documents, her laptop, tablet, phone and projects scattered all around the coffee table. She usually did this kind of things in her office but today was not a great one. She was tired and she had so much to do with this and she also didn't want to mess it up. But at the same time the couch looked the most comfortable today. 

So she sat there and looked around her. She needed to do it. Of course she was the ceo of her company and she probably has a lot of people to do this kind of project but she wasn't that ceo which do nothing and just collect money. No. She was a one hard working badass woman. 

So it turned into an evening and then night and Lexa was still in the same place working hard.  
Then she heard the door to her apartament open. She turned her head to see who was it and saw blonde hair. 

Clarke took her shoes off and walked to the couch where Lexa was sitting. The girl smiled at Lexa and asked. 

"A lot of work?" 

Lexa in a dramatic way put her head on the coffee table in all of the stuff. She said. 

"Mhhm. " 

"Did you eat anything today?" 

Asked her the blonde girl. 

"I had coffee in the morning so let's eat lunch." 

"Lexa it's 11pm." 

Said Clarke looking at Lexa's face that was right now mortified and in shock. How did that happen. 

"Oh. Okay." 

Was the only thing the brunette said. Her head still on the table. 

"It's okay. I bring gifts." 

Said Clarke bringing pizza. Lexa in that moment just felt the water starting to form in her mouth. She didn't realize just how hungry she was. 

They sat there on the couch one on one ent the other on the other end facing each other. They laughed and talked about everything. It was a really great time spent together. 

Lexa reached for the last slice on this delicious pizza. At the exact same time Clarke must've thought about the same thing so their hands touched over the slice. 

They looked at each other feeling a lot of things. But for sure feeling like a kid in every romantic movie. Was it weird? Yes. Was it scary? Yes. But was there a lot of not spoken words both wanted to say but never did?Also yes. 

So the awkward silence came. Lexa stood up to wash the dishes they used but as she did so again Clarke decided to do the same thing. It was now even more awkward than before if that was even possible. The awkwardness was just killing it. But also the tension could've been cut with a knife. 

Lexa eventually took those dishes and started to wash them. Clarke came to dry them off and put them back in the right spot. Again there was a silence until Clarke didn't know where to put them so she asked. 

Lexa was just taking something out of cabinets when she suddenly turned to answer and point where Clarke can put them. Clarke was right behind her so they bumped into each other. 

They were now so close that if anyone of them decided to kiss each other it could've been possible. So Lexa stood there and the same way Clarke did she took a deep breath. She could feel Clarke's breath on her face. She looked down at her lips then at her eyes. 

The blonde's eyes were completely focused on Lexa's lips. She couldn't take it any longer. She asked Clarke literally just whispering. 

"Do you still have feelings for me?" 

The blonde looked directly into her eyes and opened her mouth to talk. 

Bzzzz Bzzzz Bzzzz 

She woke up to the sound of her phone vibrating somewhere in that pile of everything on the coffee table. She was looking for for it for some time. She found it and answered. 

"Hello?" 

"Ms Woods it's Shay." 

She started to think again after that dream. So her assistant was calling her. Was something wrong? 

"Yeah Shay. Is something wrong?" 

"No, no everything's perfect just wanted you to know that the Earth Farm scheduled a meeting today. So I think they are interessed in the same project we're doing for EcoSky. Or something similar. " 

This was going to be interesting. 

"OK thank you. So when's the meeting?" 

"It's at 2pm."

"Great thank you Shay." 

She took her phone off her ear to hung up when she heard Shay's voice. 

"Also Ms Woods it's 1 pm right now. Is everything alright? " 

Oh. That was unexpected. Sometimes she was working on something in work hours but she fell asleep for the first time. That was a first. 

"Yes everything's okay. Thank you Shay." 

So it's time to go. And not the time to think about a very realistic and hopeful dream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's not a long chapter but it's going somewhere. More to come.  
If you liked it you can tell me if you didn't you can also tell me that so I can do better.  
Take care and be safe.  
Bye  
-MRT


	6. Chapter 6

This night was a really cold one for a summer. Lexa was wearing jeans and tshirt but she was so cold. The rain was falling so hard and it made it even more cold. But she wasn't focused on how cold she was or how many goosebumps she had on her skin. The one thing that was on her mind was that someone was standing in front of her. 

She was on a street in the middle of the night. The only light that was coming to her was from a few lamps on the street. They weren't really doing a great job because she could barely see anything. 

The rain was pouring on her and she was soaking wet but again she acted like if she didn't notice it. All that was on her mind was that this city was completely empty. It was maybe even abandoned. There were a lot of buildings and cars parked on both sides of the road she was standing on. But everything was quiet, maybe too quiet. 

She was standing there not being able to move. She didn't know why she couldn't. All she did was look in front of her where in some distance was someone standing . So the city wasn't abandoned after all. There was someone there besides her. That person wasn't facing her. They were wearing a hoodie with hood on their head. She couldn't see who it was but she also couldn't move to check it herself. 

She felt uneasy but at the same time was very curious who it was and what the might have wanted from her. 

The person started to walk away from her slowly disappearing in the night where street lamps weren't working anymore. 

Lexa couldn't move but really wanted to follow that person. 

"Wait. Please." 

She shouted. But the person didn't hear her or they pretended not to. She was fighting with what she didn't even know. With herself, with some force holding her back? Was she holding herself back from getting to that person or was it someone else trying to intervene? 

She struggled a lot and when she couldn't see the mystery person anymore she fell on the ground like if something had been really holding her back this entire time. Or was it fear? . She stood up and started to run in the direction that person was walking in. She needed to find them and she needed to do this now or she might have not had a second chance to do so. 

She saw that a black figure was in front of her to the right. Just disappearing behind a building. She run in that direction but stop because she couldn't see them anymore. Then on her left she again saw them disappearing behind a wall. She run again to them missing them always only by a few seconds. 

She was frustrated with this chase. Whatever she did she couldn't keep up with them. And she wasn't a slow runner or a jogger. She was basically sprinting from place to place with a speed she didn't know she had in her. 

Her lungs were on fire from that running. She couldn't do in anymore. She needed to stop just for a second to the a breath. But that could mean that she would lose them. 

When she stopped she was again in the same spot she was previously glued to the ground. She was breathing heavy, her hands resting on her knees with her head down. When she looked up she saw that this hooded person was standing just a couple of meters away from her. Still she was facing their back. 

This time she was able to move and that someone was not walking away. She slowly approached them and and gently touched their shoulder to face them. 

The person turned around and Lexa didn't know what to do. She didn't know what to say. How to begin how to end. She was speachless. The person took off their good and a wave of blonde hair flew from it. The most blue eyes looked inside Lexa's green ones. Lexa's hand fell from the girl's shoulder into her arm. 

Then they heard a loud thunder. The storm was really going crazy. And rain was falling even harder than before if that was even possible. The girls were looking at each other totally soaked and water running down their faces. They were standing there just looking at each other with so many emotions running on their heads and visible in their eyes. 

"We really need to talk." 

Said Lexa with a big lump in her throat. She was at the same time so afraid and so glad that she got to meet her. 

"You know what Lexa?" 

Said Clarke with a lot of many different emotion in her voice and her eyes. 

"You can't just walk into my life where I sorted it all out and destroy it. Again and again. I don't know if I can survive it the next time." 

Said the blonde girl as she turned away from Lexa to walk away from her. Lexa's hand was slowly falling from the other girl's arm. Lexa then took Clarke's hand and held it in hers so the girl wouldn't walk away. 

" Please, Clarke just give me a minute. Please." 

Clarke turned her head around with tears in her eyes. 

"I don't know if I can survive you." 

Bzzzz Bzzzz Bzzzz 

Lexa woke up to her alarm and in that exact time she really hated her life, her job, her everything. 

Just another day to think about her life choices. Great. Just great.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there. If you liked it I'm glad. If you didn't I'm really sorry. You can always tell me about it I really appreciate it.   
Anyway the story is going somewhere. I have a nice plan for it and I will try to update it regularly but no promises. Take care and be safe.  
Bye  
-MRT


	7. Chapter 7

Today was a normal one. It was a Sunday so she was like always sitting with her family at the table. It was a dinner time so everyone was eating what her mom Indra with hers and her brother Roan had prepared. Today it was a grilled chicken breast with vegetables and salad. 

They were all smiling and talking while eating. Dad Gustus was laughing at Trish for not a great aiming skills with her fork. And Roan was helping her what was creating even more mess. Mom was very happy as she was giving Lexa a second helping. 

Everything was not like it was supposed to be. Her siblings were little and younger than her where really they were older and she was oldest of them. She felt like she was 16 or 17 years old right now. She thought about it with suspicion but forgot about it when she heard a doorbell. 

She happily stood up from the table and walked to open the door. When she got to it she opened and revealed iled the biggest smile ever on face of the girl she liked so much. 

"Whose this?" 

Asked her mom from the dining room. 

"It's Clarke!" 

She shouted back as the girl took her hand and started to dragging her away from her door and her house. Lexa laughed with her and shouted to her family. 

"I'm going out. Bye." 

She didn't bother to take anything with her. She didn't even need a thing when she had this blonde beauty. She was all that mattered in this moment. She didn't even ask where they were going. She didn't have to. She trusted the other girl and she would also go to the end of the work with her. So she was following the girl that was still holding her hand and leading the way from time to time looking at the brunette girl and smiling that big smile of hers. That big smile which she knew was only reserved for her. 

They walked into a building. Lexa had never been there so she didn't really know what was in there. They walked inside and Lexa saw a lot of walls. It was some kind of a labirynth. There were a lot of paths and walls some made out of wood some made out of stone and concrete. They walked there trying to find a way out. Just like the rest of the people there. It turned out that there was a lot of people there enjoying this kind of an activity. 

It was like an escape room but with a really big labyrinth that was taking all of the building's space and it was huge. They were walking one time to the left on time to the right really having fun there but also meeting a lot of people. And also a lot of people there turned out to be Lexa's family. Closer and not so close so it was weird. But she didn't care. All she cared about was that Clarke was with her. 

When Clarke guided them to a place where there was no one. She had a devilish smile on her face. Lexa looked at her and gulped. The blonde then walked closer to the brunette so Lexa's back was against a wall. The girl walked even closer and looked inside her eyes then at her lips. She moved her head closer and as their lips were to touch one of Lexa's uncle walked by them. He didn't notice them at first so they jumped away from each other. 

He did that thing when you see someone and you don't greet them you just kind of grin or smile. The girls did the same thing. Then more people started to walk into this place so Clarke again took Lexa's hand and this time with more speed led her away from them. In the opposite direction. 

When she again found an empty space the same thing happened. Lexa's back was on a wall and Clarke was just supposed to kiss her as some people walked there. 

By now Clarke was kind of irritated because of everyone's ability to walk in on them. Lexa was just mesmerized by all of Clarke. She was following her anywhere and everywhere. Just to be with her. That young puppy love. 

The blonde girl now was walking like if she knew the way to the exit. She turned right then again, then walked three times straight ahead so on and so on. When they saw a dark corridor that was leading to the exit door they stepped inside it. Then Clarke looked around in the semi dark place to see if there is no one around. She didn't notice anyone so she looked at Lexa who was standing looking at her like if she was the most beautiful thing in the entire world. 

Then Lexa walked to Clarke, looked in her eyes asking for permission, then put her right hand on the girl's cheek and put her lips on the other girl's ones. The kiss begun with a gentle soft touching of lips, the feeling of the other person. Then she felt Clarke kissing her back and tangling her hands in Lexa's hair. The kiss started slow and very sweet. Both of them felt like there were melting. But then something changed and it started to get heated. There was a lot of hands touching bodies and skin. 

Then they heard a soft thud. 

"Ouch." 

Said Clarke. They both opened their eyes and saw that they moved and now Clarke was against the wall. So the thud was Clarke's head hitting the wall. Lexa was really scared as she took a step away from her to check if she is alright in the girl's eyes. 

"I'm so sorry Clarke. Are you alright? I'm really sorry." 

Said Lexa with nothing but remorse in her words. Clarke put one hand on her head to massage the place where it hurt. She smiled at Lexa and said.

"It's okay Lexa." 

"But are you sure maybe you need an ice to make it not hurt so much. Or oh my god do you need to go to the hospital. How much does it hurt. Maybe…" 

Lexa was talking so fast because she was really scared that she had hurt Clarke. She was talking as fast as fast she was walking back and forth. But the blonde girl stopped her in her tracks. 

"Lexa stop." 

The girl stopped talking and turned to face the other girl. 

"I just need one thing." 

"Yes Clarke? Anything." 

Said Lexa ready to drive her to the ER or buy an entire freezer of ice. She saw that Clarke was smiling again really big at her. 

"For you to come back here and kiss me." 

Bzzzz Bzzzz Bzzzz 

That was a really nice dream. Thought Lexa to herself. It was a nice thing to think that it could've been this good. It was refreshing. But it was probably not an option. Things were so much more complicated so she needed to work hard just to not remember them. Only if that was even possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there. If you're still reading this story I am really grateful because I admit it's a little bit of a mess. But I hope that everything will start coming together and there will be some "action" soon. As always if you have anything to say about this story or chapter feel free to do so.  
Stay safe (especially in this time).  
Bye  
-MRT


	8. Chapter 8

10 years ago ( end of June)  
_____________________________________

"And you're just gonna go there and study what exactly?" 

Asked pretty angry Clarke. Lexa didn't even know why she was angry. For some time things between them were different. They were in a weird place. Like everything was wrong right now. But it had happened so suddenly. One day everything had been great they were normal but the next one Clarke seemed off. Right now it seemed like every time they start talking it always ended up in a fight. 

They had started talking and then suddenly Clarke started to pick on something. Something not even important. It was like if Clarke was pissed off all the time. 

Lexa didn't know why Clarke was acting like that. But to be honest she was pretty much annoyed by that kind of behavior towards her. What was going on? 

"I'm gonna study Bioengineering and Natural Energy Sources." 

Answered Lexa trying not to hear Clarke's tone of voice. She also was trying really hard not to react to that. She was just going to say it in a normal way. She really was just tired of this shit. She decided to study that because this was something which she believed in and no one was going to stop her. 

"And that's all? Is that the best you can do?" 

Said Clarke even more annoyed if they was even possible at this point. 

Lexa just looked away and took a big breath. Like really what the fuck was going on here. 

"That's what I'm gonna do." 

Said Lexa tried to be calm. But when someone is questioning literally your life choices it is hard not to be angry. And this conversation was not a first one in that topic. 

"But is that really what you want to do for the rest of your life?"

Asked Clarke with voice slightly risen but not shouting. At least not yet. 

"I think I do. But I want to try to be sure."

Answered Lexa thinking about it for some time. 

They were on a walk with Raven. They were supposed to meet with the rest of the gang later at some concert. But right now they were walking through forest and not one of them really enjoyed the company or the beautiful view surrounding them. 

Raven's face was saying it all. She was so done with them. When they almost finished their hike and were almost in city and the two of the girls didn't stop passive aggressive comments and arguing Raven turned to them and said. 

"I'm gonna go. See you at the concert." 

She didn't even wait for them to say anything she just turned around and walked in the direction of her home. 

When Lexa turned around to look at Clarke who suddenly stopped talking she saw that the girl was sitting on a bench. She was quiet so the brunette didn't say a word. She stood a few meters away and took her time to look around her. 

They were there for some time. Lexa looked at her watch and saw that it was late so they needed to come back so they wouldn't be late for the concert. 

Lexa turned around and walked towards Clarke. She stopped in front of her and said. 

"Come one we need to go or we're going to be late." 

"I'm not going anywhere." 

Said Clarke not even looking at the other girl. Lexa was just so done with this situation and with Clarke acting like a baby. She took another deep breath.

"So I'm gonna go alone then." 

Said Lexa looking the the blonde girl whose face was now in her hands. 

"No. Don't you dare." 

Said Clarke finally looking at Lexa. Her face was unreadable to Lexa which was not something that happened often. They always got each other. When someone was feeling odd the other knew it and knew how to fix that. They were always at the same page. So now everything didn't feel right. Lexa was worried. In her eyes she saw something that she had never seen before but she couldn't quite name it. 

"Clarke. Please. Let's just go." 

Said Lexa almost pleading as she extended her hand towards the other girl. She just didn't want to argue anymore and she didn't want their friends to wait for them. But mainly she was so tired of that senseless arguments. 

Today was the worst one because the topic was her and her choice. But she was sure that she wanted to study in UCLA and what was going to be her major. Of course LA is far away from home but Polis doesn't have this good department that she was interested in. 

Clarke stood up not taking the brunette's hand and started to walk. Lexa was walking beside her. Nighter of them said a single word. It was an awkward silence filled with tension and so many not said words. 

Lexa was walking looking around their town and thinking about everything the girl said. What if she was right? Would she give up then? Would she come home? Would she feel defeated? Would she feel like a loser ? 

There was a lot of questions and a lot of thoughts running inside her head. Also there was an angry girl walking next to her. An angry best friend that she felt like if she didn't know at all in this moment. Best friend that felt like a stranger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there. This time it's a retrospect chapter but we got to finally see Clarke not only in dreams. There you go.  
As always if you have anything to say feel free to do so. I really like interacting with you guys.   
Anyway please stay safe expecially in this difficult time.  
Be safe.  
-MRT

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone that came here.  
Thank you for reading. If you liked this I really appreciate it. English is not my first language so I'm sorry for bad writing.   
I really like to write things that help me cope. It might or not might to be my life story.   
If you want to leave kudos go ahead. If you want to share a comment I would love to hear what you've got to say.  
Thank you again for stepping by and have a lovely day or night or morning or evening.   
Anyway take care. 
> 
> P. S I think I would love to continue this so if you think that's a good idea you can say so or not. No pressure.   
Bye


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